American guy, living in Wuhan... Yes, it's out there, but it's more internet meme than trend, and the meme is decidedly tilted toward high net worth individuals in high cost cities. The vast majority of single Moms I know are divorced because the guy found a younger woman, not because of wanting to be single Moms, although most are just fine with it.
Compared to South Korea, it seems China is an easier place to be a single parent. In China the grandparents of children, particularly in the villages are already use to either one or both parents being absent and thus they perform the primary caregiver function. Just having that sort of cultural/economic habit helps with nearly non-existent state care for the disabled/enfeebled elderly, such that that paternal and maternal grandparents compete for affection trying to assure that they will not be neglected in their dotage.
Big downside is that social/legal burden is an enormous emotional/economic issue for a single child, much less a single parent. A bad divorce which leaves the child with only one set of grandparents and a single parent could be seen as a relief, so much so that the state has written laws to force children and grandchildren to have some legal responsibility for both parents and grandparents. Single mothers with children from divorce is also a pretty recent phenomena in part because of CPC efforts to give women more rights. Under Imperial, KMT and early CPC rule legally the father of a child had legal rights to be the primary caregiver while women could even be denied visitation rights. This is still the case in KMT constitution Taiwan. Women in Taiwan often would dump their children from a first marriage in part to make remarriage easier, but also because their economic situation was so fraught that it was crazy to invest in a child that could be taken from them at any moment. I wish I had more time to organize a better comment covering more of the information I have, but life keeps getting in the way.
I should add under the old legal system, leaving the father's name blank in a birth report was a high risk move, as any Tom, Dick, or Harry could then have his name added, claim the child as his own, assert male privileges', and have the child as his chattel/property, This open statement of single parenthood outside of marriage in some ways is quite a new phenomena in China. If memory serves me, this was even a problem in the USA up until the 1960s, when laws treating children (edit: and wives) as humans instead of property began to be written. (Also, in a society where social contacts matter a lot, loss of half of a potential network may show big negatives for these children later in their lives.)
I'm just wondering in which part of the country 17,000 RMB annually is considered a good income? It can't be the southwest coastal region.
Single mothers certainly won't be the solution to the CCP's problems. The CCP is trying to reverse the consequences of its one-child policy and now advocates families with two or even three children. But same as in the West, these are the exceptions that prove the rule, like famous singers or Hollywood stars. Most of these single mothers will have just one child. Siblings are most commonly born within traditional families.
Thing is, a single parent and child may be a family, but in almost every culture (especially Eurasian ones) it's not a 'whole' family. The balanced partnership of mother and father is the easiest method of raising a child (preferably with involved grandparents, etc), and a single parent has to work very hard to replicate that in the absence of a partner.
These women appear to advocate basically stealing a man's genetic material under false pretenses, which is not only dehumanizing but also a new bio-ethical low (even for notorious China). This is as bad or worse than Japanese fake paid-actor families. They're extreme cases, but they show a very sick cultural malignancy just as bad as anything you see in the 'West'
Truly, no culture has cause for self-righteousness with this kind of outrage going on.
I agree that having 2 engaged parents is the easiest way to raise a child, both from a statistical outcome perspective and a social acceptance one. But I don't think the majority of women are deliberately or maliciously becoming single mothers, as you say these are just the extreme cases. As another comment pointed out, a lot of these women have been abandonned by former spouses or partners, that was certainly the case for at least half of the examples I used throughout (I know I led with the heavy hitters, but it was more to make a point).
While what some of these women is doing is manipulative in the extreme, I would hesitate to tar them all with the same brush. There are many more social outrages going on beyond what this tiny minority of women are doing, and it's certainly not deemed acceptable on any level even in their own society.
American guy, living in Wuhan... Yes, it's out there, but it's more internet meme than trend, and the meme is decidedly tilted toward high net worth individuals in high cost cities. The vast majority of single Moms I know are divorced because the guy found a younger woman, not because of wanting to be single Moms, although most are just fine with it.
Great article & happy Mother’s Day!
Compared to South Korea, it seems China is an easier place to be a single parent. In China the grandparents of children, particularly in the villages are already use to either one or both parents being absent and thus they perform the primary caregiver function. Just having that sort of cultural/economic habit helps with nearly non-existent state care for the disabled/enfeebled elderly, such that that paternal and maternal grandparents compete for affection trying to assure that they will not be neglected in their dotage.
Big downside is that social/legal burden is an enormous emotional/economic issue for a single child, much less a single parent. A bad divorce which leaves the child with only one set of grandparents and a single parent could be seen as a relief, so much so that the state has written laws to force children and grandchildren to have some legal responsibility for both parents and grandparents. Single mothers with children from divorce is also a pretty recent phenomena in part because of CPC efforts to give women more rights. Under Imperial, KMT and early CPC rule legally the father of a child had legal rights to be the primary caregiver while women could even be denied visitation rights. This is still the case in KMT constitution Taiwan. Women in Taiwan often would dump their children from a first marriage in part to make remarriage easier, but also because their economic situation was so fraught that it was crazy to invest in a child that could be taken from them at any moment. I wish I had more time to organize a better comment covering more of the information I have, but life keeps getting in the way.
I should add under the old legal system, leaving the father's name blank in a birth report was a high risk move, as any Tom, Dick, or Harry could then have his name added, claim the child as his own, assert male privileges', and have the child as his chattel/property, This open statement of single parenthood outside of marriage in some ways is quite a new phenomena in China. If memory serves me, this was even a problem in the USA up until the 1960s, when laws treating children (edit: and wives) as humans instead of property began to be written. (Also, in a society where social contacts matter a lot, loss of half of a potential network may show big negatives for these children later in their lives.)
👌👍💛🙏😍from the 10% of your readership, who also happens to be a single mum😅
Happy Mother's Day!! I hope you feel seen and appreciated 😅🌺
Thanks! I really enjoy your work 🙏
I'm just wondering in which part of the country 17,000 RMB annually is considered a good income? It can't be the southwest coastal region.
Single mothers certainly won't be the solution to the CCP's problems. The CCP is trying to reverse the consequences of its one-child policy and now advocates families with two or even three children. But same as in the West, these are the exceptions that prove the rule, like famous singers or Hollywood stars. Most of these single mothers will have just one child. Siblings are most commonly born within traditional families.
Thing is, a single parent and child may be a family, but in almost every culture (especially Eurasian ones) it's not a 'whole' family. The balanced partnership of mother and father is the easiest method of raising a child (preferably with involved grandparents, etc), and a single parent has to work very hard to replicate that in the absence of a partner.
These women appear to advocate basically stealing a man's genetic material under false pretenses, which is not only dehumanizing but also a new bio-ethical low (even for notorious China). This is as bad or worse than Japanese fake paid-actor families. They're extreme cases, but they show a very sick cultural malignancy just as bad as anything you see in the 'West'
Truly, no culture has cause for self-righteousness with this kind of outrage going on.
I agree that having 2 engaged parents is the easiest way to raise a child, both from a statistical outcome perspective and a social acceptance one. But I don't think the majority of women are deliberately or maliciously becoming single mothers, as you say these are just the extreme cases. As another comment pointed out, a lot of these women have been abandonned by former spouses or partners, that was certainly the case for at least half of the examples I used throughout (I know I led with the heavy hitters, but it was more to make a point).
While what some of these women is doing is manipulative in the extreme, I would hesitate to tar them all with the same brush. There are many more social outrages going on beyond what this tiny minority of women are doing, and it's certainly not deemed acceptable on any level even in their own society.
Please don't steal a man's genetic material under false pretenses though lol